The following I believe to be a teaching from my inner guru:
To take pride or revel in an attack on one’s behalf is to justify the need for attack. To justify the need for attack on others is to justify the need for attack upon our own self. It is an understandable reaction in this world to meet aggression with counter-aggression, both in conceptual and material aspects. Everyone who has lived a life in this form is familiar with the desire to attack and defend against attack. We are also familiar with the escalation effect that ensues and we have all experienced suffering as a result.
This can serve as the basis for forgiveness. Once we understand the desire within ourselves and absolve ourselves through love and compassion, and understand that it is a result of the flawed nature of this world, we can begin to forgive others around us for being in the same situation that we ourselves struggle with.
Zen Momentum 