When we respond with attack, we perpetuate a system that is doomed to create suffering and dissatisfaction. From this, there is nothing worthwhile that maintains its value for the possessor. The fleeting rush of victory soon fades and our proceeds remain closely guarded while we constantly prepare a defense for the onslaught we imagine will come. We cannot truly find peace and enjoyment that would make these pursuits beneficial, we reserve this only for another day. We find ourselves, huddled with our bounty, worried of how it may be seized, while our minds and bodies fall ill from our fears of the very world that provided the now tarnished object of our desires. The end is always the same, we survive for a time in a world of “shoot first and ask questions later”, “kill or be killed”, and “he who dies with the most toys wins”. The vast majority of our moments are wasted in worry and dread as we grow old, become sick, and leave this place losing everything and everyone we loved in the few unwasted moments we allowed ourselves to enjoy.
There is another way, by letting go of our desires, focusing our awareness on acceptance of the world as it is in this moment, and expressing love and forgiveness through positive action we can escape the endless cycle of attack and realize true liberation. Although the yearnings of our will may go unfilled, we can learn to see them for what they truly are, a prison that binds us with fear and distrust of our brothers and sisters. From the vantage point of desirelessness, love, and compassion we can see the struggle as it unfolds for others and learn to gently help them realize the truth about the source of their discomfort. Do not fall victim to the longing to punish those who seek glory in attack. In time, all of these lessons lead the observer to their own truth. Who knows what treachery occurs inside the chrysalis before the butterfly is born.
The following I believe to be a teaching from my inner guru:
Bring not contempt to this world. You may find pain in your heart compounded by fearful thoughts. There is a way that you can release these judgmental feelings of others without acting upon them or generating more fear-based thinking. Do not repress the emotion generated by these thoughts. Remain aware of your feelings while focusing on the breath and quieting the mind. Once the negative emotions have passed, you can work on empathy towards those that you feel contempt for. Try to understand their suffering, for no one here is without it. Forgive them for their mistakes and unskillfulness, for none of us in this world thinks and acts without error. See others as your brothers and sisters, understand that they suffer.
Also, forgive yourself for these feelings of contempt and judgment of others, for none of us is without unskillful and errant thinking. Forgiveness and compassion towards oneself will ease the expression of forgiveness and compassion towards others.
When you find it in yourself to forgive yourself and others and what they have created, you will have, at last, come to the place that we call home. In the farthest reaches of this world, love and compassion can be found. There is no place that exists without it. I tell you now that the creation of this world was not meant to cause undue suffering. There exists a desire and it was believed through the production of this world, that desire would be filled.
The truth is simple about the egoic mind. Your egoic instance will have the desire to acquire. Upon acquisition it will wish for more. As the ego gains more you will notice that it remains unfulfilled. Even if you were to fulfill the worldly desires of everyone, there would remain an emptiness in their hearts.
Know that I see the flaws of this creation and that I hold no one accountable for their suffering and actions here. While some have thrived, many have found pain and misery. This was not the intention. This profound demonstration of sadness was not foreseen. Nevertheless, in hindsight many things seem obvious. Join with me as we love and forgive those responsible for the turmoil that exists in this world.
The following I believe to be a teaching from my inner guru:
In this world, it may seem as though violence is part of the natural order. In fact, the forces that are used as foundational concepts include polarity, natural separation, attraction and repulsion. Atomic force is taught to either bind particles or expel them. Why then would we be surprised to see the same behavior happening on a human level, on a tribal level, or even a national level? It should be known that violence in its most simple form is judgment; in turn judgment is measure.
A woman decided to rank how much she was loved by each or her three children. She asked the children each to bring her a gift. By estimating the value of the gift, she would decide which child loved her the most. One child gave a jewel and this was valued the highest, another child gave a golden ring and this was valued almost as high. One child drew a picture of all of them happy and together and this was not valued as highly. This child who gave the drawing asked her Mother, why do you not love me as much? Even if she had valued the drawing higher, the other children may have asked the same question. You see, it was the Mother’s judgment, her measure of the value of gifts that caused feelings of being unloved among her children.
It is possible for us to let go of judgment. By letting go of our desires we can let go of the concept of measure and find peace. Although creation and destruction are constant in this world, nothing needs to be made or unmade, nothing needs to be transferred or stored, and nothing needs to be hidden or revealed in order for us to love completely. If you can, if just for a moment, try to liberate yourself from all desire you will come to understand this freedom and understand the fallacy of judgment. Without it, there is no attack, and without attack there is no violence. This liberation is waiting for you beneath the facade of the craving self.
Please help me to be most effective in the lives of others. What do people need to hear from you? What can I tell them?
The following I believe to be a teaching from my inner guru:
In the copious amounts of written materials available in this world, you have the honor of reading one such. It will not bring you to the door of enlightenment unless it does. In which case who was the one who did the bringing?
How do we grow healthy beings in a world that is founded in conflict? It would seem that in order to survive, only those who are most adept at winning battles and vanquishing their opponent would flourish. While there is an element of truth to this, let it be known that the joyous broadcasts of the better way ring forth with such clarity that even the most brutal opponent can hear them upon quieting the mind. No one, absolutely no one, has ever been denied the truth that there is another reality beyond the realms of this world of separateness and delusion.
Before the very first moments of this world was laid the groundwork as such for an idea that is now known to be insane. Do not think of this as failure or success, it was simply an idea of special loveliness that seemed to be sound. The pitfalls of this approach must be experienced to be understood and that experience is happening all around you in this world. Approaching our situation here with a joyful laugh and a compassionate heart will work wonders in helping to cope with the suffering we observe around us. This was never the intention, nevertheless it is the inevitable result of heralding a world of the elevated and the fallen. Even if the concept remains subjective to individuals, the pain and suffering is experienced by every being resulting in a shared experience of grief and discomfort.
We now know that the better way exists. Without promoting and demoting based on desire and aversion, we can have a world that is free from this discomfort and suffering. To be free, release all preference and loathing. Simply allow them to pass unnoticed like the pebbles that gently roll across the bottom of a clear stream. Neither attach oneself to concept, word, or object nor reject them. Simply acknowledge what is, breath deeply and rest at peace with me.
The following I believe to be a teaching from my inner guru:
Now that we have an explanation of ego identities, let’s discuss how it affects response in this world. Let’s start with a simple diagram:
The ego identity measures love, compassion, joy, and peace in degree. A person or an object can be loved more or less. For a given object, the force that is used to determine the degree of love that is felt is determined by the force of fear based thinking. Fear force is a pressure felt as an emotional response. Fear determines the placement of an object with regards to how much love is related to something. In actuality, the fear is not real, nor is the object that we perceive to be loved or unloved. Love in degree is non-existent.
Let’s not think about this love or fear in terms of good or bad. Let’s examine this with an example. Our friend prides themselves as an expert apple picker and this serves as our identity for this purpose. When presented with an opportunity to grade an apple they must decide if it is a good apple or a bad one. The attachment and sense of self worth is centered around picking the best apples, the object of measured love. Aversion in this case would be towards the bad or rotten apple. The person, or subjects, fear response is what is used to choose where the apple resides or the measure of love for the apple. A fear response of measuring a bad apple as good comes from a sense of pride in our friend’s identity as an apple picker, fear response also dictates the force of choosing a good apple as bad, in this case, the fear of loss.
Make no mistake, this same drama plays out in each identity role embraced. There is a better way. Through letting go of desire for both what we covet and what we shun, we can free ourselves from the sensory response of identity and recognize who we truly are. A manifestation of higher Self that loves without degree or measure.
I started out the day meeting with friends from my Sanga, “listened” to John Cage’s 4’3”. I thought about the Zen monk who taught a single word of Zen by just raising a finger and enlightening a student. I shared this with friends. What a powerful idea, to play music without the sound of music or to teach using a word unspoken. Both of these methods can “trick” the mind into awareness and hopefully, at some point, the observer becomes aware of the awareness and the process of enlightenment continues. Instead of viewing this as a path towards realization, we can also see it as the falling away of egoic identity. Each goal is the same; as the false self put forth by the cognitive mind dissolves, realization of enlightenment becomes more apparent. This can be a long and arduous process for the householder who still clings to the vestiges of the manifest objective self out of fear of losing one’s grip on what has been attained or what is yet to be acquired. Yet this path too, the path of desire must be fully examined before we can conclusively say that its end is always the same: fear, suffering, and unsatisfactoriness.
The following I believe to be a teaching from my inner guru:
Another approach is to simply lose oneself to the truth of desirelessness. This has always brought with it a sense of liberation beyond that which any coveted object has ever relayed to the possessor. Our brother knows this to be true yet still clings to the idea of creating a better something or destroying that which hinders progress. Neither formation nor eradication is necessary to find our way home to the peace where we reside. Simply know that you are there and that nothing is necessary for you to share in the joy of this moment but your willingness to let go of the yoke of what is.
In our seemingly endless quest for that which is better than this, we will find ourselves always falling short of the goal that we desire. This undefined pinnacle, a precipice of great price, will never be as we expected nor satisfy the ego’s desire for more. Put away the tape measure of the mind and come and be at peace with me. I have never wished a punishment upon you nor evoked condemnation of your being to suffering of any length. Length itself is but an illusion and you, my child, are always welcome at home where elements in dimension and degree are met only with a joyful laugh and sympathetic knowing. That knowing is the boundless love that I would share with you in this very moment and that moment is now.
Our room in this New York City hotel towers over the St Francis of Assisi Roman Catholic Church which was built 130 years ago in 1892. Once the prominent building on this area of 31st Street, the city grew up and over it. From such a high loft it is easy to lose perspective. The lesson here is that we are only temporary guests in this room and the buildings we see are only temporary structures in this world. Everyone and everything we know here will turn to dust and be forgotten. None of this matters when we remain consciously aware in this moment, letting go of our desires, our aversions, and the knowing of our mind. Awareness never changes.
It can be difficult for us to forgive, especially when we feel justified in our condemnation of others. We live in a world where the human ego can set in motion a disastrous sequence of events. A series of unskillful actions can lead many astray while others cheer on their debauchery encouraging them to go even farther. The end is always tragic and causes pain and suffering for the innocent. We tend to dehumanize the perpetrators the same way we perceive they have dehumanized their victims. Now they become the object of our attacks and the cycle continues.
Finally, when justice is served, those involved may take great pride in participating in the process and the punishment. Some who see themselves as the deliverers of decency may even delight in not forgiving nor forgetting. Yet when the convict is sentenced we are left with a dull sense of dissatisfaction, it never seems to be enough even when the penalty is death. It is not uncommon for adoration and celebrity to be showered upon those who work to see the culprits punished, further exacerbating the rollercoaster ride that provides heights of egoic pride and lows of internal strife as we brace for future revenge. We find ourselves imprisoned by our own retaliations as our minds devise a blame game that always finds others guilty for our internal misery.
In our hearts remains a tension, a feeling of unease as though another attack will soon come. Many times we believe that this is our lot in life; to constantly be “A warrior for good” fending off each imagined assault as they continue to pervade our fictional views of the future. We struggle to realize at the very core of our tension and discomfort is our belief in the battle of “good over evil”; “good guys versus bad guys”; “the moral struggle against the immoral”. We live in this trap believing it is normal, each of us fighting for what we believe is right. However, what we hold as forthright and just is different for everyone. Upon investigation we will always find points on which we disagree. Herein lies the lock that keeps us in this prison of our own making, it is the fantasy that there is evil in the hearts of ourselves and others which we must constantly battle but none of us completely agree upon. How can we free ourselves from this insanity?
The truth is simple, it is not evil that causes us to do monstrous things, it is simply ignorance and the unskillfulness that springs from the ego’s desires. When we attack perpetrators in the name of justice, we perpetuate a system of separation which results in the hardening of our own hearts. We come to realize a false reality in which the battle of the virtuous is never ending. We often revel in locking offenders in prisons designed to be tortuous and terrifying, hoping they are beaten or raped by others who share their same fate. Years later we may set them free to be among our loved ones again even more damaged and broken then when they began their sentence. How does this make our world safer? It is no wonder why we remain discontent and anxious in our hearts waiting for the other shoe to drop from the counterattacks we believed would save us. We arm ourselves with weapons that kill and injure our loved ones more often from our own mistakes and anger then protect us from the “evildoers” we imagine will exact their revenge on us. Each moment we spend lost in these hellish fantasies we steal only from ourselves.
There is another way, by understanding the ignorance and unskillfulness of others, we can learn to love and forgive in our hearts even the most hideous deeds. We can become proficient in responding in a way that deescalates the cycle of attack and creates a safer world for our loved ones and ourselves. This does not mean the end of justice, it simply means justice administered from love as opposed to retribution. Yes, we still need protection from dangerous individuals and they may need to be placed in an environment that provides a better degree of safety for others and themselves, one in which they can learn, heal, and make amends. It is also true that a responder or soldier may need to use deadly force for those that pose an immediate mortal threat to others, nevertheless, even this can be done with love and understanding. Prejudice and anger are not required for ending the life of a violently insane individual, this must always be a last resort.
Learning to forgive is not always an easy task, for many, this requires a profound change of mind. If we are willing, we can start with forgiving ourselves for our own unforgiving natures. This offers us a priceless gift, it is liberation from the unease and dissatisfaction we have condemned ourselves to in this world. When we love and forgive, we can live our lives free from the worry and fear of the next attack. Happiness becomes genuine and is no longer a false mask we wear for others. Even if our lives are cut short by an assailant, we will have increased our own joy and the joy of others tenfold.
Zen Momentum 